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Today marks the 13th anniversary of losing Dad. June 15th 2009 is a day when everything changed… He was very healthy and amazingly fit for his age and was still working with me every day as he neared his 82nd birthday. I had a phone call on the Monday morning from Mum saying he was poorly and wouldn’t be coming to work. He didn’t improve and a couple of days later he was admitted to hospital. 5 days later after a very short illness of pneumonia and sepsis he died – it was a terrible week and something I was completely unprepared for on so many levels.
Having worked with him for 25 years it was a massive change coming into work on my own. It was a very empty and lonely place without him. Still is to a point… I know Dad would be so pleased that John Darvell Packaging Ltd, which he formed in 1986, has survived and continues. His large presence remains at work as his writing on labels etc is still everywhere.
Dad enjoyed a long and very happy life and a loving marriage with Mum for 49 years. I’m glad that he never lived to see Mum going through bowel cancer. He would be so pleased how the family has stayed tight and are there for each other – and the fact that in recent years we have managed to re-engage with our cousins on his side of the family.
I am now able to look back on his life with such fondness. As a child I was football mad, and nothing made me happier when I saw him walking across the pitches to watch me play for Maidenhead on Sunday afternoons. Usually he would arrive for the second half as he had his Sunday lunchtime drinks to do at Maidenhead Rowing Club first! He would take me and my brother to watch Maidenhead United at York Road and he was never short of a comment or two for the linesman. He didn’t suffer fools, but was a kind and lovely man. The funniest moment was perhaps the Christmas Day turkey incident when the turkey made a break for freedom from the dining room table as Dad was carving. It slid off the table and exploded as it hit the floor. He was on his hands and knees trying to salvage the meat. I was ok as I already had my serving and had consumed too many beers to worry about it 😂
It has always been a regret that neither Dad nor Mum got to see me settle down and get married. I wish that was something that could have happened, but it just wasn’t meant to be. However, I now realise and appreciate better that as far as any kind of relationship goes, it has to be for me and not for my parents. Perhaps now as I have finally come to terms with the loss of both Mum and Dad, and also accepted and begun to recover from my depression and anxiety, that it might be a good time to concentrate on the future as I feel more open to opportunities in all aspects of my life.
But for today I know my brother and sister will be raising a glass to Dad later. I will most likely have to settle for my cup of tea later 🥰 x
